There are obviously many aspects about life in China that can bring us down, though I have to say I think I’ve done ok so far in controlling my anger/mood and simply looking at all the crazy stuff that goes on here with a twinkle in my eye and a light-hearted smile across my lips. Yesterday I saw a pair of chengguans (street police/thugs) buying an oily delight from a street vendor who only the other day they were shouting at because he was blocking the road. To me, China on the whole is just a country of sheer contradiction and if you want to go as far to hypocrisy, then I suppose you wouldn’t be being too unreasonable.

Of course, there are those dreaded “bad China days” where everything bad at once seemingly occurs within the space of a few hours and our psychological stability is put to the real test; with some of us choosing to vent in an interesting variety of methods than can range from punching a brick wall to shouting our eyes out at the sky as we finally make it home. These happen to the best of us, but I feel that I often able enter this phase of Zen-like tranquillity (with help from my headphones) whenever I’m out and about in China.

However there is one thing that I’m yet to adjust to and keep my cool about – and that is the roads in China. Not being on the road as such as I don’t have car, but crossing it. The beeping at others who are only trying to make their way to work (on a zebra crossing of course) following by the acceleration of some douche in an Audi as he thinks he’s boss just because he’s encased in a metal box. Couple that with the amount of cars that park on the pavement outside restaurants and it’s one thing that I can’t tolerate here. Pedestrians should always have right of way regardless of the situation and even if reading this some of you may feel I’m being arrogant by taking the initiative then that’s fine. The When in Rome concept is only valid to a certain point, and I don’t intend on contradicting my morals over this one.

So what have I been doing lately to combat this? Example one. During rush hour on the way to work when I’m crossing the road, if there’s a red light and cars are still trying to weave (barge) their way through pedestrians, I make a point of standing in the middle of the road and either putting my arms on my hips in protest or holding out my palm to form a “stop sign.” You’d be surprised as sometimes it does work.  Example two. If a car is repeatedly beeping at people as they’re crossing the road peacefully, then my reaction can range from giving them the middle finger to sarcastically clapping then and pulling “WTF!” faces in their wake. Example three. If there are cars parked on the pavement I make a habit of giving the driver an evil eye in protest. I have, in fact, been considering designing stickers to place on their windscreens to remind them in a civilized manner that they’re breaking traffic laws and are disrespecting ordinary pedestrians, though I think I’d have a better time negotiating with a banana.       

Maybe I am taking it a bit too far with my vigilante-esque approach to battling these driving douches as I am a guest here, but I mean come on! All of my Chinese friends share similar qualms with this as I’m sure most people do, but not many people seem to be taking any action. I read a story about a year ago about some Scandinavian guy in Fujian who stood on zebra crossings performing tai-chi in an attempt to calm down these dangerous drives. Kudos to you sir!